The Crazy Things That Toddlers Do

WebMD unlocks the mysteries of toddler behavior, from running around naked to snacking on Fido's food.

Melinda Roberts had just moved to a new neighborhood and was busy getting the bath ready for her 2-year-old son. But when the San Jose, Calif., mom spun around, there was no sign of Dylan. So she checked the house and spied the front door wide open.

"Uh oh," she thought. Peeking outside, she spotted her mischievous toddler, assuming the starter's position and sprinting down the sidewalk stark naked. Luckily, she caught up to him before his wild dash made the neighborhood news.

Toddlers like Dylan are known for their outrageous habits from acting like nudists to sticking their finger up their noses, from drinking the bath water to snacking on Fido's food. They play by their own rule books and manage to surprise even the most unflappable parents.

Today, Roberts, mother of three and author of Mommy Confidential: Tales from the Wonderbelly of Motherhood, laughs when she thinks of Dylan's antics as a toddler.

"He was a combination of a leprechaun and a Tasmanian devil," she recalls. "Once in awhile he'd just stop what he was doing and run in circles screaming at the top of his lungs and then go back to whatever he was doing. He knows he's pushing you to the limit."

That's because toddlers are like cavemen, says Harvey Karp, MD, a pediatrician and author of The Happiest Toddler on the Block. He also has a DVD of the same name. "They spit and scratch when they are angry," he says. "They pee in the living room. They pick their nose. They put food in their hair. They'll suddenly shriek out of nowhere even in a crowded place."

Toddlers live in the right side of the brain, says Karp, which is the impulsive, emotional, and nonverbal side; the left side is the impulse-control center.

"All of us shut off our left brain when we get upset," he says. "We become less eloquent, less patient, less logical. We call that 'going ape.' Toddlers start out 'ape,' and when they get upset, they really go Jurassic on you. They turn into these primitive little cavemen."

"Children don't have the same bodily shame that we do about things like picking their nose and looking down their pants," says Rahil Briggs, PsyD, an infant-toddler psychologist at Children's Hospital at Montefiore in New York.

"There's no superego inside of them, saying, 'Don't pick your nose. That looks funny to outsiders,'" she says. "Instead, there is this enormously powerful sense of curiosity and exploration."

Allison Ellis, owner of Hopscotch Consulting in Seattle, admits that her son, Wilson, who is nearly 2, acts like a "dirty old man."

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Parenting Toddlers Mistakes: Potty Training, Food, Siblings, and More

Got a toddler? Avoid these 9 parenting mistakes.By David Freeman
WebMD Feature

Children don't come with owner's manuals. Alas. Toddlers -- full of energy and eager to test your limits as well as their legs ---can be particularly tricky to parent. Here are nine parenting mistakes every mom and dad of a toddler should avoid.

Toddlers do best when they know what to expect, whether it's what time they bathe or go to bed or what consequences they'll face for misbehaving. The more consistent and predictable things are, the more resilient and agreeable a toddler is likely to be.

Fix it: As much as you can, keep regular routines for your child. Consistency can be a challenge when parents (or other caregivers) don't see eye to eye.

Not sure how best to react if your child dumps food on the floor or ignores bedtime? Sit down with your partner ahead of time to decide on an appropriate response -- and stick with it.

"You don't want to send mixed messages," says Tanya Remer Altmann, MD, the author of Mommy Calls: Dr. Tanya Answers Parents' Top 101 Questions about Babies and Toddlers and a pediatrician in private practice in Los Angeles. "You really want to be consistent."

It's delightful to spend time with the whole family. But some parents go overboard on family time.

"Kids cherish time alone time with one parent," says Thomas Phelan, PhD, a clinical psychologist in suburban Chicago and the author of several parenting books, including 1-2-3 Magic. "One-on-one time is fun for parents too, because there's no sibling rivalry to contend with."

Fix it: What's a good way to spend one-on-one time with a toddler? Phelan recommends simply getting down on the floor together and playing. At bedtime, enjoy a book or tell stories to your child.

Some parents jump in to help a toddler who is having trouble doing something. Before you do, consider the possibility that by helping your child complete a puzzle or put on a shirt, you may be sending the message that he/she can't do it alone -- in other words, that the child is incompetent.

"Parents who offer too much help may be sabotaging their young children's ability to become self-reliant," says Betsy Brown Braun, the Los-Angeles-based author of You're Not the Boss of Me.

Fix it: "We need to teach children to tolerate struggle," Braun says.

Of course, there's nothing wrong with offering praise and encouragement. "Be a cheerleader," Brown says. "Say, 'You can do this!'"

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Feeding Toddlers: Feeding Chart, Meal Ideas, and Serving Sizes

Experts explain how to provide toddlers with the nutritious food they need for their growing bodies.

Your child is walking, climbing, running, and "talking" nonstop now. Such developmental milestones mean his nutritional needs have changed, too.

Welcome to toddler territory. Armed with some basic know-how, you'll discover how best to nourish your child up to age 3.

It's ironic: Because of a slowdown in growth, toddlers, who are far more active than infants, have lower calorie needs, pound for pound. That doesn't diminish the importance of good nutrition, but it does present some challenges.?

Toddlers need between 1,000 and 1,400 calories a day, depending on their age, size, and physical activity level (most are considered active). The amount of food a toddler requires from each of the food groups is based on daily calorie needs.

In addition to choices from each of the food groups, toddlers need the equivalent of 3 to 4 teaspoons of healthy oils, such as canola oil and tub margarine.

Daily Servings,

12-24 months

Daily Servings,

24-36 months

3, at least half from whole-grain sources

5, at least half from whole-grain sources

1 slice of whole-grain bread; 1 mini bagel; 1/2 cup cooked pasta, rice, or cereal; 1 cup ready-to-eat cereal

1 small apple; 1 cup sliced or cubed fruit; 1 large banana

1 cup cooked mashed or finely chopped vegetables including legumes (chickpeas, black beans, etc.)

1 cooked egg; 1 ounce cooked meat, poultry, or seafood; 1 tablespoon nut butter; 1/4 cup cooked legumes

1 cup milk or yogurt; 2 ounces processed American cheese; 1 1/2 ounces natural cheese, such as cheddar (low-fat for ages 2 and older)

Every day, toddlers hone their motor skills, including at the table. Mastering the pincer grasp, which allows children to pick up small bits of food (and other objects) between their thumbs and the forefingers, is one of the first steps to self-feeding, says pediatrician Tanya Remer Altman, MD, author of Mommy Calls.

Children start to develop the pincer grasp around 9 months, the same time they're ready for a lidded sippy or straw cup filled with infant formula or breast milk.

Many toddlers can self-feed an entire meal at around a year old, while other toddlers may need help until 18 months or so, Altman tells WebMD.

"After age 2, most toddlers can use a regular cup without a lid without spilling, but if they enjoy a straw cup or a sippy cup, there's no harm in that," Altman says.?

Once a child discovers he can get food into his own mouth, he may not want you to help so much anymore.?

Toddler self-feeding gives a whole new meaning to the term mess hall, but it's worth it to let him try to get food into his mouth, says Elisa Zied, MS, RD, author of Feed Your Family Right! and a spokeswoman for the American Dietetic Association.

"Self-feeding is an important developmental skill that parents should nurture," Zied says.

Allow children to self-feed as much as they can and want to, advises Altman, but if they aren't getting enough food, you can help, too.

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No-Nonsense Napping Guide for Toddlers

Experts explain why toddlers need naps and share tips for getting toddlers to sleep.

Many a parent has made excuses for a cranky child because the little one missed a precious nap. ?Or perhaps the parent has dropped everything, barely obeying the speed limit, so the tired tot makes it home in time for some afternoon ZZZs.

There is no doubt about it: Napping is an important part of your toddler's day -- and yours. You count on nap time to get things done, and your child needs to recharge and reboot or everyone will suffer the consequences. But why are naps so critical to youngsters, when will they outgrow them, and how can you make sure naps don't interfere with a good night's sleep?

By following WebMD's no-nonsense, expert-approved napping guide, that's how.

"Napping conserves energy," explains Charles Shubin, MD, medical director of the Children's Health Center of Mercy Family Care in Baltimore and an associate professor of pediatrics at the University of Maryland, also in Baltimore. "When going through a growth spurt, an infant or toddler will sleep more and eat more because the energy demand that growth creates is tremendous," says Shubin, also an assistant professor of pediatrics at Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore.

"To grow, we need adequate calories and ample sleep, and that is why babies sleep more than we do," he tells WebMD. As toddlers get older, they will eat and sleep less, says Shubin.

Some of this sleeping is done as naps, while some of it takes the form of nighttime sleep. Exactly how it is divided depends largely on the child's age and developmental stage, he says.

For example, newborns sleep between feedings all day and all night long, he says. "At around 3 months, they will start developing a day/night variation and their longer sleep will hopefully be at night." This typically doesn't happen much earlier because newborns need to eat every few hours and just can't get the stretch they need at night.

"Infants sleep 16 to 20 hours per day, and as time goes on, they outgrow sleeping all day long and only take two naps -- one in the morning and one in the afternoon," says Susan Zafarlotfi, PhD, the clinical director of the Institute for Sleep and Wake Disorders at the Hackensack University Medical Center in New Jersey.

Naps tend to work themselves out, agrees Greg Yapalater, MD, a New York City pediatrician in private practice. This pattern usually is established when the child is an infant and often revolves around feeding schedules. This helps shape the schedule going forward. "You are probably feeding every three hours, which is four bottles a day, so things start falling into place and then what you are going to do about naps becomes very straightforward," he says. For example, some parents may choose an hour after the first bottle for the morning nap and then an hour after the midday bottle for the afternoon nap.

"If your child goes to day care, shoot for the same schedule that the facility imposes regarding naps," suggests Rafael Pelayo, MD, an associate professor of sleep medicine at Stanford University School of Medicine and a sleep specialist at Lucile Packard Children's Hospital, both in Palo Alto, Calif.

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